Shiver
by TheArmada4231
Summary: Elsa has lived her whole life believing that her powers make her a monster. She isolates herself from the people she loves in order to protect them, but when her imagination runs away with her, she comes face to face with what could be the only person who understands what it's like to be an outcast.
1. Chapter 1

_Dear Diary: _

_I did a bad thing. But dad says I'm not a bad person. I didn't do it on purpose, I swear! It just...happened. _

_Anna and I were playing, like we always do. We just wanted to build a snowman, that was all! We were having so much fun together, sliding around in the snow. I didn't see her start to fall off of the hill I made before it was too late. _

_All I wanted to do was catch her! She didn't listen when I told her to be careful! It's not my fault!_

_It's hers! _

_If Anna had never been so stupid, she'd be ok, and we could keep playing together, just like we always do, but I guess, little sister will be stupid, and mess things up. I don't want to hurt her again. I have to keep her away from me! My powers are supposed to make me special! But all they seem to do is make me a monster./_

"Elsa?"

There's a quiet tapping on Elsa's bedroom door, as a squeaky voice calls her name.

Elsa sits on her bed, holding her stuffed rabbit and jumps, startled at the sudden noise. Almost immediately, her hands start to feel cold. The little, white haired girl looks down to see that her toy has grown icicles on its fur. Startled, Elsa throws the rabbit across the room. The icy figure shatters against the floor.

"Elsa, do you wanna go outside?"

"Anna, please...I'm busy." Elsa frowns and stares at the door, longingly. There is a dull thud at on the other side, as though her little sister has clunked her head into the wood.

"But Elsa," the seven year old whines. "You're _always_ busy!"

As true as that may seem, Elsa can't help but feel like she's lying to her sister. She's rarely, truly busy. It's quite the opposite actually. Elsa is always very bored and very lonely. She bites her lip.

"Please, go away Anna."

There is silence on the other side of the door until finally,

"Ok, bye..."

Anna's shuffling footsteps start to fade. Elsa waits for a moment, before hopping off her bed and scrabbling to the door.

"Wait, Anna!" She rips the door open but by then, it's too late. Her little sister has already turned the corner and is too far away. Elsa considers running after her, but that would mean leaving the confines of her bedroom. She's too afraid to take that risk. With a sigh, she closes the door.

The frosty bunny rabbit is laying on the floor, halfway across the room. Elsa wrinkles her nose and sulks over to it, feeling rather embarrassed at what she'd done. It's dripping with icy water when she picks it up, so she shakes it out, in a pitiful attempt to dry it off.

"I'm sorry," she whispers to the rabbit, holding it close to her chest.

She carries the soggy stuffed animal over to the windowsill and sets it down to absorb the sunlight. The good thing about summer was that the sun could always melt her ice more quickly. The faster it could disappear, the better.

She jumps at the sound of a second knocking on her door, only this time, she is less afraid; hopeful even.

"Anna?" She asks, turning to run for the handle. This is her chance! She's come back!

The lever turns from the other side, and a big set of boots make a clunking sound as they shuffle into the room.

"Sorry, dear, it's just me."

Elsa's face falls, as her father gives her a warming smile. He was always good at cheering her up. She tries to smile back.

"Oh. Hello father." She gives a small bow, as the ladies in the kingdom of Arendelle typically do as they greet the king, and he chuckles.

"I can go and get your sister if you'd like...?"

"No..." Elsa frowns and looks down at her hands. "I don't want to bother her. She's probably already found something else to do." Her father shakes his head slightly.

"You know that she would drop everything and come to you, if you called."

Elsa can't help but feel a little guilty. Of course she knows that! But for now, she'll just have to pretend like she doesn't.

"She wouldn't want to if she knew me."

The king gives Elsa a stern look and furrows his brow.

"Maybe if you'd give her a chance to get to know you better..."

"She'd get hurt!" Elsa blurts out, throwing her hands in the air. Her fingertips surge as an icy spark zaps at her skin. "I'd hurt her," she says quietly, bringing her hands back to her stomach quickly and wringing them together. Her father steps toward her and rests a hand on her shoulder, kneeling so that their eyes line up.

"You have nothing to be afraid of," he says, comfortingly. "Anna loves you, your mother loves you," he smiles, "I love you, regardless of the things that you have done. All of that is in the past now."

Elsa tries to smile but her face just twists into an uncomfortable position instead.

"I just wish I didn't have to hide this from her."

The king caresses his daughter's face gently and sighs.

"I know," he says, as he shakes his head, "but it's for both of your own goods." He kisses her forehead and stands. "I was coming to see if you would be interested in attending your cousin's birthday party this weekend, in Corona." Elsa bites her lip, continuing to wring her hands together.

"Rapunzel?" She tugs at her hair nervously. "I don't think I should. I haven't seen her in years." She frowns. "And she doesn't know about my..."

_Curse_.

"...powers."

"I think it could be good for you," the king says, stuffing his hands in his coat pockets. "I mean, the two of you could get along pretty well. She's got that hair that glows...?" He raises an eyebrow at the princess and smiles. Elsa clenches her fists.

"But she can heal things. All I do is break them."

Her father takes long strides toward the door and sighs.

"Just think about it, ok?"

Elsa bows we head.

"Ok."

As he turns to open the door, he looks over his shoulder and frowns.

"And Elsa?" She looks up at him, sadly. "Remember what your mother and I always tell you..."

"'You're worth so much more than your gift'," they say in unison.

"I know," Elsa adds, doubtfully. Her father smiles and sidesteps out of the room, without another word.

She wants to believe that it's true, more than anything. But she just can't help but feel like life would be so much easier without her "gift".

**Author's Notes: **

**Hello all! Now I know what you must be thinking:**

**"Armada, what are you doing!? You JUST ended WCBH like last month! Why are you starting another fic so soon, and while also working in WCBH 2 ((name to be released soon ;) ))"**

**Well here's the thing:**

**I plan for this fic to be much shorter than WCBH and also, I'll be updating this one more slowly, while my Jarida fic will be much more steadily updated! Hooray!**

**Thanks for stopping by and the second chapter should be up soon. ((Or not.. I dunno xD ))**


	2. Chapter 2

"You're doing it wrong."

Elsa's matter-of-fact tone makes her father chuckle, as he puts down the hairbrush in defeat.

"Your mother is better at this than I am." Elsa giggles and nods, ripping her white hair out of it's messy bondage.

"Maybe you should just stick to braiding," she suggests, poking fun at his mediocre styling skills.

He shakes his head with a small laugh.

"Maybe you should be content with wearing your hair down."

Elsa sticks out her tongue, playfully, and grabs up the hairbrush from off of the nightstand.

"A princess never leaves her hair down," she recites, sticking her nose up, jokingly. The king ruffles the top of her head.

"Maybe your cousin could learn a lesson from you about proper princess hair technique, today."

Elsa starts to smile, but a feeling of anxiety grips her heart and she winds her hands around the handle of the hairbrush. The thought of the coming birthday party makes her a nervous wreck. Even just the mention of Rapunzel sends her into a state of panic.

"El..." Her father places a warm hand over her own and sighs. Elsa looks down and realizes that in her panic, she has covered the hairbrush in a thick layer of ice.

"No! I didn't mean to..." She takes quick, shallow breaths as she jumps to her feet and backs away from her father. Throwing the brush away from herself, she stares at the king, eyes growing wild in despair. "I'm sorry! I-"

"It's only a hairbrush," he says in a soft voice. "You've done nothing wrong." But Elsa's mind is too far gone to think rationally. She wrings her hands together, nervously.

"I'm not going today. I can't! I'll ruin everything! I always do...everyone will hate me. _Anna_ will hate me..." This terrifies her the most. Little, joyful, Anna, a bright, bouncing ray of sunshine, as opposed to herself, a wretched, stone-cold, storm. "I'm staying home! I'll ruin everyth-"

She is so shaken that she doesn't notice her father stand and move towards her. In one swift movement, he pulls her into a tight hug. Her head rests against his torso and she can feel his stomach rise and fall with each slow, steady, breath. The sensation is calming, yet her blood still fizzes, anxiety pulsing through her.

For a moment, they are silent, until finally,

"I will stay behind with you, and tell your mother and Anna to go along without us, if you really don't want to go." He strokes her hair, lovingly. "No one is going to make you do something that you don't want to do."

His words are comforting, and yet, Elsa can't help but feel a sense of sadness in his voice. He's been looking forward to the day in Corona with his Sister-in-law and her family, and she can't bring herself to ruin that for him. She swallows the lump in her throat.

"I am old enough to take care of myself..." Her father only chuckles and steps back, breaking their embrace. He looks down at her with an amused smile.

"You're ten years old," he reminds her. "You can hardly ride a bicycle." Elsa rolls her eyes and places her hands on her hips.

"I can hardly see how _that_ would come in handy if I we're left alone." She gives her father a challenging look, but he remains composed.

"What if, while we're all away, an army invades and the only way out of the kingdom is by riding your bike."

"Then I will have one of the palace guards carry me in a bike basket and pedal me out." She is content with her quick-witted response and even smiles a little. Her father raises an eyebrow.

"What if the only bicycle in the kingdom is really small?"

"Then he will sure look silly doing so," Elsa says with a giggle. Her father must be amused as well, because he gives one of his hardy, "daddy laughs" as Anna had once called it; the ones where his eyes even seem to smile, as they crinkle at the corners.

"Are you two almost ready to go?"

The soft voice belongs to the queen, as she appears in the doorway to Elsa's room, dressed in a deep blue gown. Elsa can't help but gape in awe at the beauty that is her mother. She notices her father's face turn serious for a moment as he looks to the queen.

"Actually, Idun," he says, clearing his throat. "Elsa and I decided that-"

"That we need you to do my hair!"

Elsa throws herself into the conversation before she can stop herself. Her father gives her a surprised look, but doesn't question her. Idun chuckles and steps into the room, graceful as ever.

"Of course, sweetheart." She takes one look at her daughter's tangled mess of hair and smirks at her husband. "You should have called for me sooner, Agdar."

She must notice the frozen hairbrush, laying on the floor, but she doesn't make a mention of it as she scoops it up into her hands. All she does is shake the ice off and settle down on the edge of the bed, summoning Elsa. The girl complies and slides up into her mother's lap. Idun rakes the brush through her hair and hums a soft tune.

"Are you excited to see your cousin?" She asks. Elsa wrinkles her nose and looks to her father for some kind of assistance. He gives her a comforting smile and she bites her lip.

"Kind of..." She twiddles her thumbs as her mother pulls her hair up, into a braided bun.

"Your Aunt Amelia has been telling me that Rapunzel can't wait to see you and Anna." She pins the final strand of hair in place and turns Elsa around to face her. "You look beautiful." Elsa looks down at her feet and blushes, but says nothing. Instead, she turns to her father and gives him a half smile. He nods, understandingly and reaches into his coat pocket.

"Here," he says, holding out his hands to her. Draped across his palm are two, blue gloves, that seem just Elsa's size. She gives him an uneasy look and reaches out to touch them. Her hesitancy lingers in the frost on her finger tips as she grazes the fabric. She expects ice to sprout where her skin meets the gloves, and yet, nothing happens. Elsa looks to the king in astonishment.

"I got these from the mountain trolls," he explains, a smile in his eyes. "They are laced with ice crystals, so they will never freeze." Elsa's eyes widen in amazement as her father slips the gloves onto her hands.

"As long as you wear them, they should help you control your powers," the queen chimes in, standing up and sorting our her gown. "Your father went out to get them last night, so that you can still have fun at Rapunzel's party, without worrying about giving yourself away." Elsa smiles brightly at her parents.

"Thank you!" She beams and examines the gloves. "They're beautiful."

"Be careful, though," her father says in a stern voice. "You _can_ still freeze things. These just make it easier to conceal." The princess nods, understandingly and rubs her hands together.

The sound of delicate footsteps rings through the halls, followed by a crash. Elsa jumps in surprise as a little giggle is heard from somewhere nearby.

"Be careful, Princess Anna," a guard calls. But the footsteps continue and seem to get louder.

"Mama!" Anna laughs as she runs through the halls. Elsa's eyes widen with anxiousness as she slides to stand behind her father's leg. He places a strong hand on the top of her head.

"We're in here, dear," he calls out to his youngest daughter.

"Where?" The seven year old's voice cracks as her footsteps start to slow.

"In Elsa's room," Idun replies with a soft chuckle. Anna slides to a stop as she reaches the doorway and stares at them in confusion.

"Elsa...?" She asks, tilting her head, her low-hanging pigtails, bobbing sideways. Elsa takes a short step out from behind her after and gives her little sister a half smile.

"Hi..."

It takes a moment for anyone to really process this moment, but after a short, couple of seconds, Anna gives a little leap of joy and giggles, bringing her hands together under her chin.

"Elsa!" She runs into the room, her hands out in front of her, ready to embrace her sister. Elsa shrinks back in fear.

_I don't want to hurt you again!_

But her father strokes her hair gently and her nerves seem to subside, just enough for her to take a step forward. Anna slows as she approaches the white haired girl and fidgets, nervously. Elsa is about to say something when the little girl speaks up. She reaches for Elsa's hands.

"I like your gloves!" Her face seems to light up as her fingers caress the fabric and she shivers. "They're cold!" Anna smiles at her sister. Elsa forces a smile in return, recoiling her hands, and slipping them behind her back.

"Uh...thank you." She doesn't address the last comment and instead, looks to her parents.

Her mother seems to understand her discomfort and reaches out to touch Anna's shoulder.

"Darling, are you ready to leave?" The little redhead grins.

"Yes yes yes!" She exclaims, turning her attention away from Elsa. "I wanna see Punzie, and Pascal!" She hops up and down, giggling. "Oh! And the lights! I wanna see the lights!"

"As do I," Idun chuckles. "Come along dear. We should be boarding the ship." With a guiding hand on Anna's shoulder, she leads her to the doorway. "We'll be waiting on the dock."

Elsa watches as they go, Anna skipping alongside their mother and babbling about nothing in particular. The white haired girl feels a hand on her shoulder and looks up.

"I hope you didn't do that for me," he says with a small smile. Elsa wrings her hands together and shrugs.

"I did it for _me_," she says plainly. Although it's partially a lie. Of course her father played into it, and Anna as well, but the main thing was the look of disappointment she knew her mother would wear all day. To see such a pretty face look so sad should be a crime.

"Well, I'm very proud of you." He kisses her forehead and turns toward the door, holding it open to her. "Shall we?" He extends his hand as an invitation for her to take it. Elsa giggles a bit and places her gloved-hand, gingerly, into her father's palms. For the first time in forever, she isn't afraid of hurting him.

"We shall."

* * *

**Author's Notes:**

**Woah this is going faster than I'd anticipated. I guess once I start writing, the words just sort of move. **

**I've got chapter 1 of WCBH 2 already written but I'm debating on posting it now or later. What do you think?**

**Also, I used the parents names from the Disney Wiki site so yeah... **

**I really love the relationship between Elsa and her father. I think it'll be big here. And even her mother. It's gonna get better i promise :) **


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